Parenting
A Guide To Respectful Parenting Support From Infants To Toddles For The Modern Asian Parent
10 min read | Updated on 30-03-2023 by HappyPreggie
"Punishment might bring short-term obedience, but it will hurt the connection you have with your children in the long run". Every parent wants to do the right thing for their children. Creating a positive and respectful parent-child relationship is a continuous feat to be done daily. But in order to receive cooperation from your children, having responsive connections and interactions are the keys to the respectful parent-child relationship.
In this Q&A With Expert Series, we have Ms. Carmen Chan who is a Parent Educator and Co-founder of Raised with Wonder, a Respectful Parenting Advocate to share her advice on the most frequently asked questions about your relationship with an infant to toddler.
This can be so frustrating. Know that a young child’s brain is highly underdeveloped when it comes to impulse control and regulating their emotions. So frequent tantrums are a sign that your child is developing normally. Research shows that the part of the brain that controls emotional regulation doesn’t fully develop until their mid-twenties!
The good news is you can manage it confidently without needing to yell or punish. Here’s what you can do:
It’s easy to also want to lose it when your child is screaming and flailing. The urge to yell “stop it!” or do something to them to make the tantrum stop can be very real.
If you need to leave your child with another caregiver for a few minutes to calm yourself, go ahead and do that. You can let your child know, “Mama feels really angry right now and I need to go to my room to calm down for a few minutes. I’ll be back with you when I’m calmer.”
Reframing tantrums as being a healthy part of their development helps too as it reminds us that it’s not an emergency and letting them release those emotions can help them become more balanced after it.
So try to stay as calm as possible without joining in their dysregulation as your calm presence will help your child calm down easier.
In this Q&A With Expert Series, we have Ms. Carmen Chan who is a Parent Educator and Co-founder of Raised with Wonder, a Respectful Parenting Advocate to share her advice on the most frequently asked questions about your relationship with an infant to toddler.
Q1. My child is always throwing temper tantrums even for small things. How do I handle his sudden emotional outbursts?
This can be so frustrating. Know that a young child’s brain is highly underdeveloped when it comes to impulse control and regulating their emotions. So frequent tantrums are a sign that your child is developing normally. Research shows that the part of the brain that controls emotional regulation doesn’t fully develop until their mid-twenties!
The good news is you can manage it confidently without needing to yell or punish. Here’s what you can do:
#1 Be the calm to their chaos
It’s easy to also want to lose it when your child is screaming and flailing. The urge to yell “stop it!” or do something to them to make the tantrum stop can be very real.
If you need to leave your child with another caregiver for a few minutes to calm yourself, go ahead and do that. You can let your child know, “Mama feels really angry right now and I need to go to my room to calm down for a few minutes. I’ll be back with you when I’m calmer.”
Reframing tantrums as being a healthy part of their development helps too as it reminds us that it’s not an emergency and letting them release those emotions can help them become more balanced after it.
So try to stay as calm as possible without joining in their dysregulation as your calm presence will help your child calm down easier.